Game the System
Did you know that each time your phone pings, your brain gives you a small hit of dopamine? That means physiologically, people get addicted to dating apps because they are designed to get you hooked in the same way addictive substances do. Are you addicted to dating apps?
One study showed the average Tinder user spends over 90 minutes per day swiping and chatting in the app. Another report says people spend about 10 hours per week on dating apps.
There is a gamification element to swiping as well. Whenever you get a notification, it feels like you’ve won something. Even if you have no intention of ever meeting that person, the match alone gives you a fix. This is how people get addicted to things like video games and gambling.
In fact, online dating was created with the same psychological principles as Vegas slot machines. They hijack your pleasure centers and create a false reward system. It’s no surprise so many people are addicted to dating apps!
Think about it, how many times have you deleted and reinstalled an app from your phone? It creates a toxic environment where the app makes you feel bad about yourself, so you delete it. Then, you start feeling lonely, and that makes you feel bad too. So you download it all over again.
“People who self-described as having really addictive-style behaviors toward the internet and cell phones scored much higher on depression and anxiety scales. With growing support for the connection between technology use and mental health, the relationship between motivation for cell phone or internet use and well-being warrants further exploration.” –Alejandro Lleras
Too Many Choices
The number of bots and spam accounts would shock you. Some apps even hire employees who chat with users under fake profiles in order to engage them in the app more.
Estimates show at the rate things are going, by 2040 70% of couples will have met online. So, dating apps aren’t going away anytime soon. If anything, they will probably get more Black Mirror-y as artificial intelligence evolves.
In his book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, Mark Manson says, “Basically, the more options we’re given, the less satisfied we become with whatever we choose because we’re aware of all the other options we’re potentially forfeiting.”
This is known as the Paradox of Choice.
According to the Association for Psychological Science, critiquing multiple candidates causes people to be more judgmental. This makes you more likely to dismiss a perfectly good candidate for something trivial.
This can also have an effect on commitment. When you have access to hundreds of potential dates in your pocket, how do you stay focused on one person? Is there motivation to work through the hard times or will people start giving up on long-term relationships, constantly chasing the honeymoon phase?
Is the grass greener on the other side?
When asked to choose between a committed relationship or something casual, 87% of women, and 61% of men said they wanted a serious relationship. The problem is the apps are designed to make you crave quantity over quality.
Are you addicted to dating apps, but looking for a better way to meet like-minded individuals? We can help you kick the habit.