There’s so much advice out there about how to have a successful first date, but what do you do after that? Unpacking the experience of meeting someone new is often more complicated than we would like. It’s pretty rare that a date is completely perfect from start to finish.

Awkward silences, miscommunications, and mismatched expectations can all make first dates a bumpy ride, but they don’t necessarily mean there’s no potential connection to pursue. If you’re not sure whether you should go on a second date, don’t worry. Here are a few signs it’s worth seeing them again.

Good Sign: You Had Great Conversation

If your first date was marked by effortless conversation where words just seemed to flow, that’s a fantastic sign! It means you’re comfortable with each other, and that’s a solid foundation for more dates.

Having a great conversation is more simple than you might think. According to several experts, including Morra Aarons-Mele, author of Hiding In the Bathroom: An Introvert’s Roadmap to Getting Out There (When You’d Rather Stay Home), the secret is to listen as much or more than you talk.

“If you just talk a lot you might get exhausted, but if you ask questions and listen and draw people out, they’ll think you’re a great conversationalist.”
Morra Aarons-Mele

A smooth conversation makes the date more relaxed and fun, and that makes it easier for both of you to be yourselves. This can clue you into your compatibility as partners. While we recommend keeping it positive and relatively light, letting the conversation flow where it may can reveal the answer to any number of questions about your connection.

Good Sign: You Discovered Shared Interests

Did you discover that you both have a passion for hiking, a love for movie musicals, or an obsession with trying out new cuisines? Finding common ground can be like striking gold. It gives you something to bond over and ensures that future dates won’t be short of fun activities to do together.

When you find common ground, it’s easier to feel comfortable with each other and enjoy meaningful conversations. Shared interests provide a foundation for deeper connections to develop over time. When you have things in common, you’re more likely to understand each other’s perspectives and enjoy spending time together.

Shared interests can often reflect underlying values and goals. Discovering that you have similar priorities can be reassuring and increase the potential for a long-term relationship.

Good Sign: There was Chemistry

Chemistry is like a spark that makes you feel drawn to each other. Did you find yourself laughing at their jokes, feeling a flutter in your stomach when they smiled, or just enjoying their company? If so, you might have stumbled upon something special.

“Chemistry” in the dating world isn’t just chemical reactions. It’s a combination of things like physical attraction, shared interests, and engaging conversation. When you have chemistry, conversations feel easy, and you’re excited to spend more time together.

While this is a great early sign, it’s important to remember that chemistry alone will not sustain your relationship for long. For surface-level interactions, this is enough, but a serious relationship thrives on a deeper connection. Often, an initial spark is simply lust, and this will fade over time if not supported by a strong foundation.

Good Sign: There was Mutual Respect

Pay attention to how your date treats you and others. Do they listen attentively when you speak? Are they courteous to the waiter? Respect and consideration are non-negotiables in any relationship. If your date checks these boxes, it’s definitely a green light for a second outing.

Respect fosters open communication, trust, and empathy, which are essential elements for a successful relationship. When both individuals show respect for each other’s opinions, boundaries, and feelings, it creates a sense of safety and comfort. This indicates that you value each other as individuals and are interested in building a connection based on mutual understanding and consideration.

Good Sign: You Have Shared Values

While opposites may attract, shared values are the glue that holds relationships together in the long run. Did you discover that you both value honesty, kindness, or adventure? When your core beliefs align, it paves the way for a deeper connection and a stronger bond.

The old adage that opposites attract is more myth than reality, as it turns out. In a study published by the journal Nature Human Behavior, researchers found that couples share about 89% of traits. This includes things like how often they smoke or drink water, as well as deeper traits like political compass and religious beliefs.

Good Sign: You Want To See Them Again

The biggest tell-tale sign? You find yourself eagerly looking forward to seeing them again. Whether it’s because you can’t wait to hear about their latest travel adventure or simply because being around them makes you happy, that anticipation speaks volumes.

While the chemical cocktail created by lust in your brain is often nothing more than that, sometimes it can indicate the beginning of something deeper. When you begin falling in love, it changes your brain.

“When you fall in love, your body produces a cocktail of chemicals, including dopamine (for wanting more), noradrenaline (for excitement, focus, and attention), testosterone (for sexual interest and drive), and a drop in serotonin (which can cause that low-key obsessive feeling). These chemicals make us feel happy, giddy, energetic, euphoric, and youthful.”
Kelifern Pomeranz, PsyD, psychologist and sex therapist

So don’t worry if you feel nervous about asking for a second date. Those butterflies in your stomach are trying to tell you this is an opportunity to connect with someone special.

In the end, trust your instincts. If your gut is telling you that a second date is worth exploring, then go for it! After all, love and connection are all about taking chances and following your heart. So why not see where the road leads? Who knows, it might just be the start of something beautiful.