As a high-level executive, your career is a big part of your life, and naturally, you’ll want to talk about it when you’re on a date. But how do you share this important part of yourself without sounding like you’re giving a TED Talk or turning the conversation into a one-sided interview? The key is striking a balance between talking about your work in a way that’s engaging and ensuring your date is involved and interested.
Let’s break down how to do that:
Tell Stories, Not Facts
Nobody wants to feel like they’re reading a résumé during a date. The best way to make your career interesting to someone who may not work in your industry is to tell stories. Everyone loves a good story—especially one that’s entertaining, funny, or reveals a deeper aspect of who you are.
For example, instead of saying, “I manage a team of 50 people,” you could share a story about a time you helped your team overcome a challenge or an unusual situation that happened in the office. Stories add personality to your career and give your date a chance to relate on a human level, even if they don’t understand all the technical aspects of your work.
Remember, it’s less about the details and more about the experience. Focus on how these moments made you feel, how you handled them, and what you learned. This makes the conversation feel more personal and less like a job interview.
Focus on the Relatable Stuff
Your date might not know the intricacies of your job, but they can still understand and relate to some aspects of it. This is where you can highlight the universal themes in your work. Talk about teamwork, leadership, balancing work and personal life, or overcoming obstacles.
For instance, instead of diving into the complexities of a recent project, you might say, “One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is how to manage stress when deadlines are tight. I’ve had to figure out how to stay calm and keep my team focused, even when things feel overwhelming. It’s made me a great partner for game nights!”
“One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is how to manage stress when deadlines are tight. I’ve had to figure out how to stay calm and keep my team focused, even when things feel overwhelming. It’s made me a great partner for game nights!”
Themes like stress management, problem-solving, or learning to work with different types of people are universally relatable. This makes it easier for your date to connect with what you’re saying, regardless of their own career path.
Keep It Short and Sweet
When talking about your career, it’s important to keep things concise and be aware of how your date is responding. Share a few key points, then check in with your date—both through their verbal responses and their body language. If they’re leaning in, asking questions, or showing curiosity, feel free to expand a little more. But if they seem disengaged or are giving short responses, it’s a good time to shift the conversation.
You don’t have to go into every detail of your job or explain every project you’ve worked on. It’s okay to give a brief overview and then let the conversation move on to another topic. Think of it as giving a highlight reel, not a documentary. Your date will likely appreciate a balanced conversation where both of you get to share and listen.
Make It a Conversation, Not a Lecture
The last thing you want to do is turn the date into a lecture about your job. Instead, aim to make it a two-way conversation. After sharing something about your career, ask your date questions about their experiences or thoughts. This not only makes the conversation more dynamic, but it also shows that you’re genuinely interested in getting to know them.
For instance, after talking about how you handle leadership challenges, you could ask, “Have you ever had to deal with a difficult situation at work? How did you handle it?” Or, if you’re discussing work-life balance, you might ask, “What’s your approach to managing stress in your own job?”
By engaging your date, you create a more balanced and interactive conversation, making it easier for both of you to connect.
Show the Human Side
Your career isn’t just about what you do—it’s about how it has shaped who you are. Instead of focusing solely on the job’s technical aspects, share how your work experiences have influenced you personally.
For example, you might explain how a challenging project helped you develop resilience, or how leading a team has taught you patience and empathy. This brings a deeper layer to the conversation and helps your date see beyond the job title to who you are as a person.
People connect through shared human experiences, so don’t be afraid to talk about how your work has affected your personal growth, values, or the way you see the world.
Skip the Business Jargon
One of the quickest ways to lose someone’s attention is by using jargon they don’t understand. Even if your date is polite and nods along, they’re likely not following if you’re using industry-specific terms or technical language.
Keep it simple. Instead of going into the nitty-gritty of your field, explain things in layman’s terms. If you find yourself slipping into jargon, take a step back and rephrase. For example, instead of saying, “I’m responsible for overseeing the cross-functional integration of department workflows,” you could say, “I help different teams work together smoothly on big projects.”
“I help different teams work together smoothly on big projects.”
This ensures your date doesn’t feel lost or confused, making it easier for them to stay engaged in the conversation.
Switch the Focus to Common Interests
Once you’ve shared a bit about your job, don’t linger too long on the subject. Transition into topics you both enjoy. Ask about your date’s interests, hobbies, or experiences. Finding common ground makes the conversation more enjoyable for both of you and keeps things from feeling too work-centric.
For example, if your date mentioned earlier that they love hiking, you could say, “It sounds like you’re really into the outdoors—what’s your favorite hiking spot?” This shifts the conversation to something you can both explore together and keeps things balanced.
Remember, dates are about getting to know each other as people, not just as professionals.
Add a Little Humor
If your job has some funny or unexpected moments, don’t hesitate to share those! Humor is a great way to keep things light and fun, especially when talking about work.
For example, you might recount a time when a meeting went hilariously wrong or share a quirky office tradition. People appreciate humor, and it can make even work-related topics more engaging. Just make sure the humor is appropriate for the conversation and isn’t overly self-deprecating or too focused on inside jokes from your industry.
Final Thoughts
Talking about your career on a date can be tricky, but it doesn’t have to be boring. By focusing on storytelling, keeping things relatable, and engaging your date in the conversation, you can share this important part of your life without losing their interest. Remember to keep things balanced, show your personality, and have fun with it—after all, dates are about connection and enjoyment!